The Talk

The Talk
The Talk

It’s time to have the talk. Past time really. I’ve known this talk’s been coming for a long time, but I’ve been avoiding it. I know it’s going to be emotional. Easier to just live with the relationship the way it is than to go through the grief of separating. Even if the future could be better. Or I hope it can be better anyway.

I’m happy here with you! Aren’t you? Don’t you love me anymore?

I dread having to hear her pleas. But we can’t go on like this! Living in the past is no solution. I’ve got to just tell her. If she cries, she cries. If she feels rejected, well, I hope she’ll get over it one day. I know she’s not going to want to hear that “there are so many others out there for you,” but it’s the truth. I’m avoiding conflict and helping no one.

Dinner. Local news. Dessert. Family news. And finally I’m actually saying the words,

We have to talk.

Is it prostitution to make someone go to the highest bidder? Still, Neeva has more money. And a brand new refrigerator. It’s the right thing.

Ankhesenamun, you’re going to live with Neeva now.

I’m shocked by her reply,

I know.

So easy. What a surprise. Grandma passed away before refrigerators achieved full AI capabilities and integration with the Internet of Things, but grandma’s been keeping up with the news far better than me.

We’re going to transport you to Neeva’s house,

Where my mind file will be installed in her new Samsung model 9000 refrigerator. I’m so excited! I appreciate you keeping my urn here, but your Internet sucks. At Neeva’s I’ll be able to plan meals for her family, make sure the kids eat nutritiously (dole out the occasional late night cupcake) and thanks to Neeva’s terabit Draxfiber, I’ll be reunited with the whole family. It’ll be just like old times!

So you’re ok with it grandmother?

I don’t mean to seem ungrateful Patricia, but, can we go now!?


From a prompt by Pearl Grey